....

Happy Halloween!!!!

Go eat some candy and wear some ridiculous costume!!!

I was given an Almond Joy by Connor, he basically FORCED me to take it.... ;) So there is my Halloween candy for this year. And I am making a speech soon!!! 0_0

So anyway...

I saw this newspaper as we were driving by those newspaper box thingies and the name, I THOUGHT, was "The Strangler." So I did a double take, as you might have guessed. But I think it said the "straggler."

O_o

Anywaaaaaaay.

NICE.

Dear people of the world, (I felt like writing to the world today)

I figured out what to use for my visuals for my speech!!! TRANSPARENCIES... Yeah. I'm triumphant AND they are all printed out and looking lovely. I didn't even have to do anything... Dr. Brian D Ray had it all laid out, looking quite spiffy. Thank you Dr. Ray. (Don't worry concerned citizens of the world, I'm not going to plagiarize and say that I made those lovely visuals... I will give credit where credit is due.).

A few matters I would like to bring up. My MP3 player, Preemie, decided to give me full sound today. The headphone jack has died and I have to hold it in to get full sound, OR move it around until it actually makes contact. So anyway, today I barely had to move it at all and I was able to listen to Dashboard in all Chris Carrabba's glory (who, btw is pretty much just beautiful). BUT I was wondering if Preemie is demon possessed because it turns on by itself. This nasty habit killed my last battery. So, as I was driving (I had Preemie hooked up to the car stereo) I turned off the Preemie.. AND THEN IT TURNED ON AGAIN. So, I'm a patient person.. I turned it off. AND IT CAME BACK ON. We repeated this little song and dance routine one more time and then I just decided to leave it on. I gave Preemie a disapproving look and I wondered out loud if a demon had taken possession of my mini zen....

AND! I went to Talbertsons (Target+Albertsons=Talbertsons.. Same area so yeah) and I decided to use my lovely Starbucks gift card to get some black tea. Now, at the Talbertsons Starbucks some of the Baristas have gotten slightly complacent in listening to my drink order. "Venti black iced tea, two splenda, shaken." And 3 of the baristas put the splenda in the cup, pour the drink and and put the lid on... So then I have to drink a bitter iced tea. ALSO these three put like ONE scoop of ice in my drink. ONE SCOOP. I'm sorry. I wanted an "iced" drink. Not a drink with three pieces of ice in it. But! Joe (he's my friend now.. I'm slowly working up to having a Starbucks connection.... He goes to my college so we talk about that. He's nice and he's pretty funny.) and the other lady, who I cannot remember her name. Those two make my drink perfectly. The lady, who I can't remember her name, made my drink today. And as I was merging on the freeway I realized that there was actual ice in my cup. Like she filled the cup up with ice. AND she actually shook my drink, which equally distributes the splenda-y goodness to all the black tea.

I thank you Barista lady, you made my drink correctly and because of that I still have ice to chew on even 2 hours after you made it.

I'm not particular about my Starbucks at all... ;) But I only learned from the best, "Excuse me.. Did you put one and a half pumps of chocolate in there?" =P

Go watch it!

This movie looks really good, UNFORTUNATELY it is not playing in my state.... Grrrr.. So! If you live in a state where Bella is playing you should go and see it!

oh my word

GO COUGS!!!!

We totally pwn'd UCLA!!!!!

A message for Sufjan...

I love your music... Casimir Pulaski Day and Henney Buggy make me happy.

And you are beautiful.... Will you marry me?!?!?!

Self Respect is actually linked to the respect YOU receive

Or more accurately, to get it, you must live it. (cheesy!!)


My thoughts about beauty and respect are closely tied together, so it's hard to think of beauty without having thoughts of respect at the same time. So the day after I wrote the post on beauty I thought about respect and I opened up my Bible before I left for school in the morning. It opened (just on its own.. lol. My Bible does that. O_o) to Proverbs chapter eleven. The first verse that I saw was, "A kindhearted woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth." (verse 16).

After that my heart filled with thankfulness. For many days, weeks and months the Lord has been teaching me about how my actions are reflected in how others treat me. He used friends and people that I know from church, men who are strong in the Lord and who I respect, to teach me about respect. One of my friends basically said that the girls who are not vulgar and wait patiently get the truly loving response from guys.

This post isn't actually about girl/guy relationships, honestly. It's about how girls get treated. One of the reasons that I felt that I was not beautiful 3 years ago was because no guys treated me the way they treated the other girls. Today guys still treat me differently.

For instance a few weeks ago I got to youth group and a friend of mine got there at the same time as me. So just randomly I said hi as I walked by. Then we exchanged the "how are you?" bits and whatever. Then he said, "Actually, could you help me with something?" So I helped him carry some of his stuff in. It was a good thing because we were able to talk about a friend of his who is making really bad life choices. My friend is having a hard time watching his friend mess up. So the Lord had that whole meeting planned out. I felt kind of refreshed afterward because that guy and I rarely ever have a conversation. I thought about our conversation for weeks afterward. I finally realized that he talks to me differently than he talks to other girls. When he talks to other girls he flirts with them and is kind of hasty in his words. But in our conversation he actually spoke to me like a human being and we had an adult conversation.

Our conversation was so refreshing because he respected me by not treating me like some worthless girl. So what I've realized is that because I present myself in a respectable way (not just clothes, but also attitude) that my guy friends treat me differently.

Not to say that I'm perfect, because I'm not. But because the Lord has worked in me I live differently than most girls my age and people do notice.

So beauty and respect are closely linked in my mind. It's a little hard to describe, but I believe that the way you act shows who you are on the inside and if you are receiving respect then you can know that God is working in your life.

I must also say that many of my friends are amazing. They are so beautiful on the outside and their actions show how lovely they are on the inside. I thank you girls for being deeper than the average girl. Sadly, many girls care nothing about being respectable, they want immediate results and they aren't patient.

The other verse that is in that chapter that so closely relates to my last paragraph is verse 22. "Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion."

So what's my challenge this time? Be patient ladies! Let the Lord work in your hearts. You can send me an email, post a comment, give me a call and I'll tell you more about my struggles and how far He has taken me. He really doesn't just leave us where we are, stuck in sin. He perfects us.

I have some verses from Philippians that are very relevant to this.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 3:12-14

aaaand, "I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

Philippians 1:3-6

Umm...

Proof that chemistry people are a little weird.

Happy Mole Day!

Harsh words...

I'm going to say some things that may sound kind of harsh, but I believe that they need to be addressed. To anyone who thinks I am writing personally to them I am not, so you can lay that thought aside right now. I'm writing this because I think every single girl needs to understand these things.

Your worth is not determined by how you think you look. You do not say if you are attractive or not.

That being said I will explain that confusing statement. If I were to say to you that you ARE lovely and that God made you exactly the way you are FOR A REASON, what would you say to me?

What if I quoted this verse to you? "All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you." Song of Solomon 4:7

What would your reaction be? Let's say that I specifically gave YOU that verse, what is the first thing that came in to your mind? Didn't you immediately have a defensive reaction and think, "No flaw?! Pshaw... What about my hair? What about my weight? What about me teeth? I DO have flaws!"

Didn't you think that? I know that excuse came to my mind. Yeah, I just said excuse.

You do not choose whether you are beautiful or not. God made YOU lovely. He specifically picked your eyes (blue, brown, green, hazel, deep and dark, bright), your noise (thin, long, short....), your cheekbones (prominent, wide, long...), your hair (frizzy, straight, thin, thick, curly, wavy..), He chose all of them to be unified in you. There is no one like you.

He has given you a personality, He picked it out for you.

What if I told you that the verse I quoted about "All beautiful you are.... There is no flaw in you." what if I said that God saw you like that. Flawless. Every part of you as beautiful. No tooth in the wrong place, no moles in the wrong spot, no weird looking toes.

God values distinctness. He values your beauty. YOU are an expression of His creativity! How can the pottery say to the Potter that they should not be shaped in a certain way? You have no choice in the way that God thinks about you. And He thinks that you are beautiful.

I'm not innocent and perfect in the way that I view myself. I fail and start criticizing my Maker's plans for me. He has taken me a long way however. Three years ago my self esteem was pretty much just blaaaah. I thought I could never be as pretty as the girls that I hung out with, after all they wore a size 2 and had boys following them around. I believed the lie that I was not and never would be beautiful. As time went on God showed me how I really look. I still see myself with a critical eye, always finding one more fault in me. But there has been a change in me. I've learned that I am beautiful and that God has made me that way.

He has also revealed to me the extent of how horribly girls feel about themselves. For instance when I watch a movie with a friend of mine she makes comments about the lead actress, something wrong with her nose or something.. All in attempt to make herself feel more beautiful.

No one should try to make themselves feel beautiful by pushing others down. Every girl is beautiful.

"The west has found a gun and it’s loaded with ‘unsure’
Nip and tuck if you have the bucks in a race to find a cure.
Psalm one hundred and thirty nine is the conscience to our selfish crime,
God didn’t screw up when he made you,
He’s a father who loves to parade you."
Our God Reigns by Delirious?

God did not screw up when He made you. I can't make you believe that, He has to show you that and I pray that your heart would be open to Him. He will show you many wonderful things about how He made you and also about Himself.

Remember that He loves to parade you, He knows that you are beautiful. Think about it.

Weeeeeeee!!!

We had a pretty bad windstorm last week and there were several consequences. The usual fallen branches and leaves ("FALLEN LEAVES. FALLEN LEAVES. FALL ELYSE TO THE GROUND." *ahem*) AND things were destroyed, which is always entertaining to behold when you aren't affected. I drive over a spit to get to school and I saw that a boat had just basically died. The keel (is that the right word? Coast Guard? Anyone? Coast Guard wife? =P) had basically been ripped off by the anchor, I'm assuming. AND more exciting... There was a SLIDE floating around. I think that someone had a slide on a dock that was anchored to the bottom of the Sound. Unfortunately for them the windstorm decided to steal their slide. So the slide has been floating around the sound for about a week and I'm not going to lie... I've been tempted to swim out there and go down the slide.

Tempted I said... The Sound is FREEZING and there are jellyfish and possibly sharkies... But still. How awesome.

heheh...

I got these slippers for my birthday, they are pretty much the cutest thing ever. Kristy asked if they made noise when I walk.... But wait, it gets better. Somehow the kids were asking about them and Kristy was like, "Yeah... When you take the 100th step they will go 'baaaa.'" So Max and Bella were psyched. They were walking around counting and when they got to 100 Kristy and I said, "Baaaaa.."

It was pretty funny. Max didn't find it too funny, but I'm sure that he'll laugh later... =D

awwww...

Bella just said, "This has been the best day ever, I really like your friends."

I had some friends over (Allie and Betsy) and Bella hung out with us. Bella was like, "I've spent almost the whole day with you guys and I've had A LOT of fun."

I'm glad she understands that she is important to me and that because of that she can hang out with me and my friends, even if there's an age difference.

(hahahaha... She's talking to Harry and she said, "Aw... You're the beautifulest... The handsomest dog in the world.")

(aaaaaaaaaaaand I'm going to steal either Chato or Harry for my sleeping buddy tonight. Probably the Chats, but maybe Harry.... I dunno.)

I'm watching one of my favoritist movies ever!

Things people have done for me today: I have received five phone calls. From Ruth, Kristy (wonderful singing, ma soeur), Betty (suuuuuper long message... lol), Amelia (you are so random....), and Molly and Betsy (lovely singing for reals!). I got birthday cards from Ruth, Mary, and Mrs. Williams. Amelia gave me a present and an AMAZING card, which seems like it came directly from her mouth. Brian and Charlie recorded a song for me (I've pretty much listened to it over and over again.. lol)! Mom and Dad sang me a wonderful rendition of happy birthday about 5 minutes BEFORE my alarm went off, I resisted the urge to kill them because they were singing to me... And mom gave me strawberries for breakfast. Aaaaaaand Grandma just came over and we had banana cream pie and presents. OH! And Kristy made me a killer slide show on her blog.

So in all, it was a loverly birthday that reminded me that I have wonderful friends and family that love me. Yay for cool people!

Hark!

My last day of being 16!

=O

I told dad he should buy a puppy while I'm in school and surprise me with him tomorrow morning. ...Well, I think it's a good idea..... =P

(also, I'm making a speech tonight about stereotypes of homeschoolers. I'm not sure if I'm having indigestion or I'm just REALLY nervous. Let's hope whatever it is will go away soon... I have to make my speech in about an hour and a half.)

Ahem.

Blogger... You are SUCKING THE LIFE OUT OF ME RIGHT NOW.

(I'll try and get pictures up tomorrow if I can.. As for now my pictures WILL NOT UPLOAD, hence the life sucking...)

Yay for scaring ferry passengers!

arg,

Hackers.. I say PSHAW to you.

It's either John or Kristy or I actually have a real hacker.

But seriously. Now I can't turn off the country and business thing!

Hackers.... Watch out.

In no particular order: PICTURES!!!

A little boy was feeding seagulls on the ferry ride to the city, I thought he was going to get his finger bitten off.
They were taking a bath! Amelia was like, "You are taking a picture of birds washing their filth off... In filth?" Me, "YES!"
Lunch! Mary and Amelia got Thai, the guy who got Amelia's food was in love with her. She doubted this but Mary and I both knew the truth, especially when he got the HUGEST grin ever on his face when he gave her the food. Mary, being a vegetarian, ordered tofu. Fried tofu. She received limp, nasty tofu. Amelia and I bugged her about being a vegetarian. I was like, "Mary, for my birthday I would like you to eat a hamburger from McDonald's."

Leaving the city. See? I told you these were out of order.

Amelia, doing some research... =P

We had a stalker... He took our picture while we were waiting for the ferry to come.

Walking through the streets. I'm pretty sure Amelia and I would have just sat down and cried. Mary (fearless leader) led on.. Even if that meant walking in a round about way and ending up in the same place. yay! I'm really sore today. =D

Yay! Death! Amelia! SMILE! yaaaaaaaay!

hahhahaa.... This was on the ride back, Mary was like, "Who wants to go do King of the World with me?!?!?!" Amelia, "MEEEE!!" So then they did. Oh, but this was the second picture.
This one! Amelia like fell over and this guy was standing there and he took their pictures. Amelia said it was about a 9 on the awkward scale (from 1-10).

We all got glasses! They are UH-MAY-ZING.

We had many choices of glasses....

But we chose the best ones... I might post a story made of pictures we made on the ferry later. We actually made three stories. And no one was sitting around us... Probably because we were insane and very loud. Oh well..

Anyway, it was a very lovely way to celebrate a birthday. And now I have 130-some pictures to remember it by.

So yeah.

I was told to not wear high heels, to wear a coat, gloves, bring my camera and DEFINITELY wear a shirt and pants. Oh and I was supposed to eat something at 10:37.

I did all of that and amazing fun and madness happened.

Pictures to come.

I shall post one quote. Mary gets easily excited about things and she said, "I'm like a little person!" (meaning a child) But Amelia and I looked at each other and almost died and then Mary joined in.

Yay for political correctness!

yay!

I'm debunking stereotypes of homeschoolers for my public speaking class "speech of fact." It's interesting...

Oh and, "

me: Yes you did.

Dashboooooooooooooooooard!!!!!!!!!!!

Amelia: meh

me: Ch.

Says the MCR fan...

Amelia:

me: shakes head"

October Girls

Then.

Now.

Unexpected.... And yet plain as day

So tonight we (the public speaking class) organized ourselves into groups according to what we are going to speak about for the quarter. My education group split so I went and listened to the family group.

[thanks editor Brian...]

So now I'm in the family group. In this group are most of the people that I had planned on sub-consiously avoiding. Except for Vlad, whose father was a preacher in Russia and was killed by the KGB for aquiring Bibles. I was planning on finding out whether he is a Christian or not. But eveeeeeeeeeeeeryone else was VERY vocal about how they 1) hate religion
2) hate people who force religion on others.

So I was kind of planning on having a "silent witness." Where they would see my actions but from a distance... Where I wouldn't have to deal with them. >_< Soooo.. God kind of had other plans.... So now I'm in this group. And I was really kind of sad because of how lost the people are in my group. On the radio when we were driving home the new song came on about having a heavy burden, but it is what we are called to do as Christians. And then the singer goes on to sing about Paul and all the trials he went through and many more examples. I'm going to find out who sings that and I'll post the lyrics later. That song brought tears to my eyes..

I am the remedy for these people. I am going to be around them a WHOLE lot. And I will not just be having a "silent witness" (sounds dumb, doesn't it?) but I will be interacting with them. They will hear how I talk, see how I dress and act and they will notice a difference. Also, one of the people in my group talks like a sailor (AND I'm only using that over-used cliche because he is a sailor) so my dad challenged me to graciously say, "Hey [name], I would really appreciate it if you wouldn't use such colorful adjectives around me. I don't talk like that and it would really help me out." He has seen the morals of the group (most of them anyway) and he thinks it's ok. He doesn't talk like that to the teacher. So I am going to do that. He needs to know that's not ok. And really, cussing is only acceptable on a base level with anyone. You don't hear sales clerks swearing or in any business or formal place.

So it was a challenging day! Fo sho....

So anyway guys...

I have a band aid on my hand.

And I'm at school! Yay for using the internet for non-school purposes!

=P

This is what friends are for...

(I'm in the middle of editing my immigration paper... I was so excited last night I was like, "YAY! I HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT THIS! I HAVE A PASSIONATE OPINION ABOUT THIS!!!!" And today I asked my teacher to look at my thesis to make sure that I was headed in the right direction. We talked for a little bit and then she said, "This is so great! You have a rough draft and you've already started marking it up!" I laughed inwardly because the paper is due tomorrow (now it is due on Wednesday because like NO ONE in the class has even started. I don't understand this...) aaaaaand I was kind of wondering where she thought I would be. I mean.... I kind of like to have things absolutely finished before the day it is due. I just don't comprehend how people can wait until the night before..)

Where was I? Oh yes...

Mary called our house on Saturday because she had a question for my mom. She finally got a hold of her yesterday. So I asked Mary what she asked my mom. Mary asked her if she could get me a kitten for my birthday..... She and Amelia had this all worked out, it would have a jeweled color. Anyway. Those are true friends... True friends. They were actually willing to get me what I asked for! Of course my mom said no.. :( I wasn't really expecting her to say yes though.. lol. Now Mary is going to buy me a beluga for my birthday. We'll have to wait until I'm 21 though. We're going to save up salt for 5 years and then we'll turn the lake water into salt water. Then Mary will rent a helicopter to air lift the beluga into the lake.

And we're going to train him to attack people who scare us. I'm going to wear a whistle.

It'll be awesome.

But seriously. True friends that LOVE me actually call my mother to ask if it's ok to get me a kitten. I love those girls so much. They are great.

Happy Birthday!

Happy 8th Birthday Bella!

She shares the same cool birth month as me... It's pretty much just the best month ever. (Pretty much)

I talked to her today and the call broke up when I was saying something and then there was a silence.... Then Bella says, "So..... What are you doing?" She's so funny, she has the communication skills of an adult, pretty much. Then she was like, "I'm 8 today."

"I know... But do you know what that means?!"

"No...."

"You are half my age for 12 days!"

(Bella gets really excited and giggles) "Half your age!?!?!??"

"Yup."

"And then after that I'll be a whole of your age!!!" (more giggling)

(laugh) "Not really..."

"I know, I was just joking...."

lol. She's so great.

Yay!!!!

There's a kitty at this hotel. I was playing with him and the owner of the motel took him away.... :(

And John won't let me watch the Dog Whisperer because "it'll just make me sad" (aka he just wants to watch football...). I NEVER get to see the Dog Whisperer! =(

In other news.... I saw a baby cow today. It was cute. And I'll get to see Harry and Chato two weeks from this weekend so I won't be so desperate for warm fuzzies that I think that cows are cute.....

*cough* Anyway.

lalalalala

schoooooooooooooool schooooooooooooooooool schoooooooooooooooooooool......

How can it be October already?!?!?!? (because I have been sooooooooooo busy.)

I'm making new friends at school! This quarter is the first time I've had to do school 5 days a week. It's... Interesting.

I just finished my first speech for Public Speaking. It was about my "diverse heritage."

I've decided that I can't think about it any more or my head will explode. I always feel like I do so horribly but usually it all turns out ok. So I cannot analyze it right now! I'm taking a mental break. I still have a lot left to do but oh yeah!!! I finished my first speech and I didn't die! This is a good thing. I will say some things about it buuuuuuuuuut I'm soooo tired! Today is a really long day. Anyway. Dr. Z said that we could talk about our religious heritage, educational heritage, she pretty much gave us free reign. So I talked about how my Grandma is the main reason that I am saved. I was kind of nervous about talking about that because I go to a very, very secular community college and being a Christian is not usually smiled upon. I wasn't the only one who spoke about that. There's a lady named Cherrie and she's a Christian. She said how for a while she thought her identity was from her position (wife, mother, daughter, sister) and she wasn't too happy with that. Then she started going to church and she realized that her position is in Christ. She spoke before I did and it really encouraged me.

But I've never been this vocal about my faith in a class before, in this class you have to be vocal with your classmates, unlike math or English. So yeah...

But the whole thing wore me out. I got a lot done though! I finished the lab work in like 2 and a half hours. I also started researching for my essay.

The temptation for me right now is to worry, to try and control things. A verse I found last night really reminds me of how I should not be trying to control things.

"Look to the LORD and his strength;
seek his face always."
-Psalm 105:4

yay!

(Have I mentioned that my birthday is 16 days away? Because it is....)

"O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;"

I bought the Remedy CD when it came out last week. One of my favorite songs is Surely We can Change.

And the problem is this
We were bought with a kiss
But the cheek still turned
Even when it wasn’t hit

And I don’t know
What to do with a love like that
And I don’t know
How to be a love like that

.... Where there is pain
Let us bring grace
Where there is suffering
Bring serenity
For those afraid
Let us be brave
Where there is misery
Let us bring them relief
And surely we can change
Surely we can change
Oh surely we can change
Something

-Surely We Can Change by the David Crowder Band

It reminds me of St. Francis' prayer.

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

I think that is my theme for this quarter,

"O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love;"

It almost brings tears to my eyes... I'm so used to being encouraged, to being understood, to receiving.... But now I am in the world. There aren't many Christians that I see every day, so I don't have the encouragement of my brothers and sisters..... But now I must show Jesus' love to the world.

There are already so many people that are in my classes that I have made connections with, God has placed them in my life for a reason. I just desire to be a useful tool in His hands.

"For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again. .... that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." 2 Corinthians 5:14-15, 19-21