Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Dear Elyse..

I've decided to answer some questions people had when they googled a word and found my page. If I had a chance to answer their questions personally this is probably what I would say.

My blog's name is Jehovah Jireh, this is because in my life I am learning how He provides perfectly for every situation. He will never stop being Jehovah Jireh (the Lord who provides) to me, ever. Now that we've covered that I will move on, I've received 161 hits for respect just because I made one post about it. Well, if you want to know more about respect I suggest you read that post, there were also a few hits for self respect, well.. That's in that post too.

I have received 102 hits for wisdom teeth and that's not counting the various other "impacted wisdom teeth," impacted wisdom teeth," "wisdom teeth out," and "wisdom teeth operation." I have very little advice about this because I am not actually a doctor, but you will find embarrassing pictures of me and some wonderments about the surgery from me. I do suggest that after your surgery that you DO NOT go to Starbucks, no matter HOW MUCH you want it, it will just end badly, believe me. I woke up from my surgery, mom got me to the car, lalalla and I was like, "Maaaaaaahm... STAAAAAAHBAAAAAHKS." XD And then I cracked up because I could hear how retarded I sounded, "STAAAAAHBUUUUUUKS" And then my mom looked at me and was like, "Are you sure?" "STAAAAAAAHBUUUUUKS!!!" hahahahah!!! That was some good times right there. ANYWAY, I got my iced tea... Aaaaaaaand lol. You can't use a straw for a few days so that you don't suck out the blood clots that form in the holes so I was trying to sip it, in the car, with a numb and swollen face.... Besides the fact that I was bleeding and I had like four cotton swabby things in my mouth to soak up the blood, so I was drinking my own blood.. =x And then the cotton swabby things tasted like blood and a black iced tea lemonade.

Moral of that story? Don't order Starbucks after your wisdom teeth surgery, k? K.

hmm.. Moving on, 56 hits for "ferret" and 26 for "ferrets." Well, here's the thing. I hate them. They creep me out and they smell bad. Don't buy one.

Now for three in a row, "bobbing Jesus," "I have a lump on my wrist," and "moses the lord will provide." Well, Dashboard Jesus is the post for you, lucky contestant numero uno. I too had a lump on my wrist, but it went away. Don't have surgery if you have a ganglionic cyst and it's tiny, just wait a few months and rub it to see if it goes away. Mine did, maybe yours will too. :) Aaaaand for #3 I have no idea. The Lord will provide Moses? I think He already did. 0_o

"how to feel beautiful when no one thinks you are" well, I would say to you that people do think that you are beautiful. Our self images are pretty whacked because we are all sinners, so don't think you know how others perceive you, "The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it?" the next verse goes on to say that, "I, the LORD, search the heart," (Jeremiah 17:9-10a). Just think of that, you don't know your own heart, but the Lord does. Perhaps He is the only one to say who is beautiful or not, and believe me... He knows that you are beautiful because He made you, and He made you flawlessly! But, if you want to read more about how God views us you can head over to my post about beauty, which you might have already read.

Alrighty then, moving on. "lord will i ever have a boyfriend?" I'm sorry, this made me laugh. And I'm not sure how this person found my blog.. I mean, it's not like I make a lot of posts about how I feel like I'm missing my better half and that I really need a boyfriend. Because I don't. I suggest that if you are wondering if you will ever have a boyfriend to read the Word and find out what He has to say to you. Although, perhaps this post may have something for you.

"picture of pomeranian with jesus" hahahahahhhahaa!!!! You are quite the creative one, eh? "random facts about macaulay culkin" lol. Umm.. I had a friend named Seamus who lived down the street from the time of our infancy to about eight years of age and he looked like Macaulay Culkin, fortunately he no longer does and he has not followed Macaulay's path, as far as I know. "sufjan stevens casimir pulaski day" That is a good song, but then again I just love Sufjan. "best movie ever" that would be Bride and Prejudice.

Well folks, that's about it for this edition of Dear Elyse. Fare thee well!


jelvistar said...

Relyse the Thunder

Father Cory said...

I found this blog by typing in "where the crap can I find a mousepad cheaper than forty bucks anywhere in this freaking state?"

No joke.

Sir Brian The Manly said...


P.S. Cplace mousepads were only like 5 moneys. YAYS!